I'm 20 years old, and I've never been kissed. Is that weird?
Not at all. I didn’t have my first real kiss until I was 18, and he was awful. The only kiss that really mattered happened when I was 23. Don’t get bogged down by the hype of the “first kiss”. It’s usually awkward at any age. Find someone you vibe with, and then just let it flow.
“I was drawn to all the wrong things: I liked to drink, I was lazy, I didn’t have a god, politics, ideas, ideals. I was settled into nothingness; a kind of non-being, and I accepted it. I didn’t make for an interesting person. I didn’t want to be interesting, it was too hard. What I really wanted was only a soft, hazy space to live in, and to be left alone.”—Charles Bukowski (via nice-shrubbery)
Do you ever worry that life is passing you by. I feel that way all of the time. I want to enjoy my life and have experiences. I want to fall in love, find a job I love, to be happy, and have my first kiss with my dream guy. I am 24 and I feel like I am 40. Do you ever feel lost and hopeless? Or is it just me.
Oh, it’s definitely not just you. Most days I feel like my life will be nothing more than potential and opportunity. There’s so much I want to do, so many things I want to experience, and for some reason NONE of it is happening right now.
We’re at this age of transition in our lives, and we also happen to be maturing at a very tumultuous time in our country. Things are tough, socially, economically, morally…it’s all big clusterfuck and as mid-20somethings it’s harder than ever to keep afloat. I’m 25 years old and I lack direction. I’m a writer who’s scared to write. I’m a girl worn and weary from love. I hold multiple degrees but I’m absolutely terrified and disillusioned by the real world. I haven’t even started the “best years” and already I’m worn the fuck out.
Through all this bad shit, we just keep pressing on. Why? Because hope is all that’s left. So don’t give up. Even when you struggle, take comfort in the idea that you aren’t the only one. There are so many of us who want the same things you do.
Oh, and P.S. just get that first kiss out of the way. Don’t build up the anticipation of a “dream guy”. Most guys aren’t knights in shining armor, but rather twatwaffles in tinfoil.
Our experiences with others enhance us. Relationships and love lost add depth to who we are. Being with someone else doesn’t make us whole. Stop looking for your “other half” in significant others. Fulfillment cannot be sought out through a warm body or tight embrace, but rather from within. We need to stop deluding ourselves.
Sooner or later you just have to get up, dust yourself off, and stop moping. The person you spend your entire day pretending to not think about is off living their life. It’s not about moving on…but reclaiming a part of you that was lost.
I see those inspirational pictures that reiterate tired cliches about letting people go, moving on, or whatever general phrase about love lost and the only thought that crosses my mind is
"If only it were that easy"
Sometimes no matter what you do, how busy you force yourself to be, how many songs you listen to, you will never drown out those thoughts or feelings. They (whoever “they” are) aren’t going away just because a pretty picture with Helvetica font told you to be strong.
so whats the word on chapter 6? and how many chapters are you planing for this story? seems like you're dragging it out a bit...I'm wondering what direction the story is gonna end up going
Chapter 6 is coming along nicely. I’m hoping to have it out by the end of next week. That’s a tentative date, but I’m trying to give myself plenty of time around the holiday. So far there I’m looking at 8 or 9 chapters in all. This story is much different from my others. It’s not particularly about sex, so much as a recovery. To me, it would be unrealistic and a bit insulting if the conflict was quickly resolved. I’m sorry if it’s dragging, that wasn’t my intention. I’m really taking my time and trying to flesh out my situations and characters.
The next chapter finds Grady enjoying a burden-free summer and really deepening his relationship with Arden. He discovers a lot about her and finds out just how similar they are. I promise much will be explained.
Chapter five was fantastic. Every time I read a new chapter of yours I'm always blown away. Whenever you publish your books just know you have a fan for life.
Aww, you rock! I was uber nervous about this chapter, but all the positive responses (including yours) really makes my day. I’m actually working on my something that I hope to submit to publishers. It’s a bit nerve-wracking and a lot of work, but fingers crossed because I’m pretty excited.
I don’t know why, but this is making me laugh my ass off. Well I’ve been transitioning my hair since May. I normally wear it curly. Right now it’s straw curl style, which is a bitch to do, but I love the look. It’s about shoulder-length when straightened. Hope that answered your question. Lol.
Uh…well that’s kind of difficult. I’m not particularly big on drooling over famous people…but I am quite in love/lust with Kid Cudi. And that’s putting it mildly. He’s probably one of the few artists I legit stan for. He could wife me.
Haha, that’s the only person I can think of right now. Probably because I’m listening to album as I type this.
I haven’t dated anyone in a while, but to answer your rather blunt question…yes, I do. My first boyfriend was an awesome guy, who happened to be black. He was a big nerd like me, so that was a bonus. I’m attracted to different things, hence my lack of a “type” of guy. There are traits I find incredibly appealing in one guy that would annoy the hell out of me in another. I’m most attracted to a good sense of style. I don’t care what color he is, if that man is casket sharp and smells heavenly, I will climb him like a tree.
Do you write stories about BW with other leads besides WM?
Yes. “Always and Never” features an Asian lead. Getting Over Edie’s secondary character Tony is also Asian and dating Gemma, who is Aborigne. My new story due out next year has a multicultural pairing. I try to mix it up.
Yes. I started watching the show months ago. It’s really interesting. It’s nice to see “offbeat” black characters receiving national attention. There’s a few things I take issue with, but for the most part the show is good for a chuckle.
So I just realized I totally forgot to announce the winner of the Favorite Couples Poll. With 43% of the vote, it’s Derek and Tegan. Thanks for taking the time to vote. Many of you have expressed your love for my characters and I truly appreciate that.
I have a rough idea for this little holiday tale. Look for it mid-December or sooner.
the story can resume. The one I had been planning on that evening walk. I can become again the man who once crossed the surrey park at dusk, in my best suit, swaggering on the promise of life. The man who, with the clarity of passion, made love to you in the library. The story can resume. I will return. Find you, love you, marry you and live without shame.
Hey you know something? You are seriously cool. All the time. Don't forget that for a second. Thanks for being you.
Aww, thanks! This makes me smile, because most of the time I’m a big ol’ geek (seriously, my level of dork can reach embarrassing levels at time). It’s nice to know someone out there appreciates it! Thanks for the shoutout. And I’m totally digging your glasses!